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| Twilight | |
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| Topic Started: Jun 6 2009, 02:01 PM (330 Views) | |
| BarkAtTheMoon | Jul 9 2009, 08:49 PM Post #11 |
Your Friendly Neighborhood Wolf
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It's funny you say "English words," World. Is English not your first language? If so then it's pretty impressive that you can get through a novel like that with such a setback being that the novel is in English. |
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| SweetandSourCaro | Jul 15 2009, 06:07 PM Post #12 |
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I did enjoy the books, but im not one to say "OMG best book ever!!!!" I enjoyed them but im not a crazy hyped up fan. |
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| Mr. Lawltastic | Jul 17 2009, 07:08 PM Post #13 |
Hmmm...this Fanta tastes like magic...I LIKE that *falls over*
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I just saw an ad in this thread from TalentHunter...apparently, they're casting for the next movie...OH JOY >___> And since this thread is about the BOOKS, I'll say that my ex was addicted...went over the synopsis for EVERY...SINGLE...BOOK >__> It WAS last year, but still...I forgot everything she said, anyway *cough* |
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| wtflove | Oct 14 2009, 12:54 AM Post #14 |
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Oh God, I hate Twilight. It's horrendous. The last book, Breaking Dawn... I feel like ranting, but I have a busy day ahead, so... TOMORROW NIGHT I SHALL RAMBLE. Maybe. o3o |
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| TheBlackCrow | Oct 15 2009, 06:58 PM Post #15 |
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Yes I have already heard you rant on the vampire fluff bs series but please for the enlightenment of others do share. |
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| wtflove | Oct 15 2009, 08:29 PM Post #16 |
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I'll mostly rant about Breaking Dawn, because it's just SO bad. *takes a breath* Breaking Dawn was horrible. Stephenie Meyer kept trying to pull a Harry Potter, no lie. (Epic Fail Battle Scene, anyone?) Bella Swan, also known as Mary Sue, which is also known as Stephenie Meyer herself, is full of bullshit. I had no problem with her in the first book (note: this was BEFORE the Twilight series became mainstream). The second book, I was starting to get annoyed by her pessimistic, emo-kid attitude. Third book, I wanted to punch her in the face. With Breaking Dawn, I wanted to... you know that scene, in Transformers, when Megatron breaks Jazz and says, "I WANT TWO?!" That's kinda what I wanted to do with Bella. Queen Bella - as she so humbly grants - is a bitch and simply COMPLAINS throughout the novel. She complains about the nice Italian car that Edward buys her. She complains about the ring, about the dress, about the whole damn wedding. She complains about marrying that man of her DREAMS. GOD FORBID SHE MARRY EDWARD CULLEN. But in the end, she goes through with it and - being the hormonal teenager that she is - convinces Edward to have sex with her. Wait, what? Stephenie Meyer, are you promoting necrophilia? Continuing... Edward, concerned for Bella's well-being, tells her that it could end badly because she will still be human and he is a vampire. But... what Queen Bella wants, Queen Bella MUST have, even if it's not a good idea. They later have sex... so, you know, Bella's basically fucking a rock. A very, cold rock. As for Jacob Black, your resident furry... he falls in love with her. In the third book, she decides that she loves Edward more. Jacob is heartbroken. Okay. Let the boy go. But no. Queen Bella needs to have her cake and eat it too in front of the werewolf. Queen Bella needs Jacob to "feel whole" and "complete." And the Cullens, who still have problems with the wolves, let Bella have her way, because she is QUEEN BELLA. ALL BOW BEFORE HER. Edward's love gets ridiculous. In fact, it's not even love anymore: it's blind devotion. He gives her things that she wants, even if it's detrimental to her health. And if I have to read one more line of how he is so beautiful and how Bella gets a fucking seizure every time she sees him, I'm gonna smack a bitch. It's ridiculous. Now, this brings about another topic... Stephenie Meyer had placed rules for her series. Vampires have no circulation of blood. So, from what I see it, no circulation of blood means no erection. No erection means no knocking up Bella. And also, if Rosalie, cruel and ice princess Rosalie, cannot bear a child because she is a vampire, because her eggs don't work and are scrambled, how can Edward's semen still kick? How can his sperm cross the bridge? Yes, Stephenie Meyer gives an explanation, but it is confusing and pathetic and leaves enough holes for me to play whack-a-mole with. The whole book was wrong. Jacob imprints, meaning to fall in love forever and ever, on Renesmee Carlie Cullen, or Edward and Bella's demon spawn baby. Oh, I would LOVE to hear what he's going to tell the young girl: "So yeah, Bella was a MILF but she was kinda taken so I went for you instead." I never thought of Jacob as being a pedophile... What also sketched me out in the novel was the fact that when Bella was pregnant with her demon child, Edward wanted her to have an abortion; Bella, being Bella, is stubborn and refuses for him to kill it, since she "feels a connection with the baby." Thus, Edward goes to Jacob the werewolf and goes, "Hey, you wanna screw my wife and get her pregnant?" WTF. LOVE TAKEN TOO FAR?! LAWL The final battle of the Volturi... the epic battle that millions of fans looked forward to, the same epic battle everyone waited for in the Deathly Hallows... nothing. zilch. Only one person dies: Irina. Who's Irina? Nobody knows; she was mentioned briefly in B.D. Then she disappears and shows up again. And she dies. Irina? Who? What? Where? Stephenie Meyer gets the reader excited: she brings in all these vampires with their own special power, so you automatically assume, "Wow, this is going to be great! An intense battle to the death!" But no. Bella uses her magic power of self control (which can apparently shield everyone else) in battle and ZOMG ALL IS WELL! The Volturi leave and everyone cheers because BELLA SAVED THE DAY! LAWL! What completely blew me away was Bella as a vampire. The building of the three previous books was to show a difficult she needed to make: her family or immortality. She goes with immortality and it had been previously said that she may not get to see them again. Yet, in B.D., she meets up with her dad and he doesn't notice anything out of the ordinary. Uh... what? Well, then obviously she will give into the pain and hunger of being a newborn vampire. However, Bella's power, the reason why Edward cannot read her mind, the reason why Jane's illusion of pain don't work on Bella, is because... OF HER AWESOME SELF CONTROL. Thus, Bella is not susceptible to fresh human blood. Nope. It's because she has self control. Because she's a SUPAH VAMPIRE QUEEN! Now, my friend Aiden and I were trying to figure out what the cover of the book meant. We pulled up pictures of Breaking Dawn and were figuring out what the white queen chess piece and red pawn in the background mean. The white queen is, you guessed it, BELLA, THE WHITE QUEEN VAMPIRE! And the red pawn is... US! EVERYONE! FOR BELLA WILL FIND US AND SUCK US DRY! EVERYONE RUN FOR COVER! At least we had some "dark" sensual bed scenes that vaguely seem like thousands of stories on fanfiction.net. (Funny fact: Did you know Stephenie Meyer is a Mormon? Actually, that would explain a lot of things...) Overall, a House of Mirrors makes more sense than this. But be careful; since Bella is a vampire, she may SNEAK UP ON YOU SINCE SHE HAS NO REFLECTION AND DRINK YOUR BLOOD! Oh wait. She has a reflection; she saw how beautiful she was in a mirror when she was reborn. LAWL. Some people argue that it's a good book; some even make good arguments, I will admit that. But a majority of the fans are ppl dat typ liek tis. Some go for the overused phrase of "Bella loved her demon spawn baby so much that she would suffer for it." um. hello? This is the same Bella Swan that got queasy and sick at the sight of blood in the first and second book. This is the same Bella Swan who, in B.D., seems to have no problem drinking human blood WHILE STILL A HUMAN and even thinks "Hey, this is good." The point is that Stephenie Meyer had laid out certain character traits and certain rules and completely disregarded so she could "bring the unexpected." Bella Swan had the most obstacle-free path and has a happily-ever-after. Even SNOW WHITE had a harder path to her happiness. I could go on, but I have a study session. Maybe later. |
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| CyberFish | Oct 15 2009, 09:30 PM Post #17 |
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And to think some of the fans shoot people with flare guns and break their arms over this >.> |
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| wtflove | Oct 15 2009, 11:56 PM Post #18 |
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They can suck my ping pong balls for all I care. |
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| TheBlackCrow | Oct 16 2009, 02:42 PM Post #19 |
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Jesus I don't remember the rant being that long... |
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4:29 AM Jul 31
